Have you ever felt that you want to just spout off just to get something off your chest and feel rrelief ? Well I do sometimes and I thank my close friends who let me let off steam. Doesn’t happen often because I have a pretty positive attitude abut life. I am grateful for where I am in this space in time and to quote Margret Trudeau in her newest book,, I am in the final chapter of my life. That could be quite dreary to think about but no it isn’t.. This is where I can say what I want , not feel guilty for thinking bad things about people and treating my self to wonderful things or vacations, whatever comes to mind.
I was called to task when I spent money on new funiture for my new apartment. My oldest son thought that at my age I shouldn’t be wasting the money.. So was I suppose to live with derelict hand me down stuff that had hardly survived my two boys? Don’t think so. I was entering a new chapter in my life and wanted new. I could afford it so why not? I didn’t go crazy spending, I got good deals and was well within my budget. In this chapter of my life I now look at funiture that is beautiful and it makes me grateful for first being alive and second being able to buy new without denting the bank account. (Yes boys your inheritance is secure.)
That brings on another thought. Why do we feel compelled to leave our children well provided for? My mother did and I am forever grateful for that gift but still if the adult children have good solid careers they should be taking care of us. In some countries of the world the children grow up and look after us.. I know for years my younger son always said he would look after me in my old age. “Well son, I’m now old and I don’t see you anywhere nearby.” The oldest never said that and he was the one who got angry at me spending money on furniture. I still shake my head at that and put it down to a bad moment for him.
Realistically we should look after ourselves. I may have wished for children caring and loving but if it doesn’t happen so be it. I have my own life and all the joy that I can make for me. I am happy that my children are self sufficiant and seem to be happy in their own worlds. That is all a parent can ask for as everything else is a bonus.